I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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