your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Fuck now we have to have sex
In a bet, need to win
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
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i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.