Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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