I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize