we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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