when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
