Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
