just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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