I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
someone owes me an orgasm
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
