I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
