My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
whose parrot is this?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize