Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
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