it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The beer is more important than you right now.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
