I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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