All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
