hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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