i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
