We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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