whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
