Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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