Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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