I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
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