He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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