remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
love makes seman taste better
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Randomize
