:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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