Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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