It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.