I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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