My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
