dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Every concussion has its silver lining
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
