She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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