You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
