fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My Sexting was not on an AP level
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
