So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
