Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize