How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
