So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Randomize
