I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize