Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize