Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
