...so i touched it.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
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