U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Randomize
