Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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