Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Im part way to drunk.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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