she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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