People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize