i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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