**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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