no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
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she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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