he shaved USA in his pubs
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
