my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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